dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
You took a bar mat shot.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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