We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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