I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
