Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize