Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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