new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize