walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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