Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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