i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
