i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Randomize
