We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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