Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Randomize
