It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
