Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
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