You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
