All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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