I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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