I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
