Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I have demons in me.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
