I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Randomize
