My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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