You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
