I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
