I showed him my bush... on skype.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
false alarm, still single
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