I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
last night I used snow as a chaser
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
