Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
