awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
