I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
