His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize
