My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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