i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
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