Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
