Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
