is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
