windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
