Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize