there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
