Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Randomize
