More tranny stories later!
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
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