he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
