I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
3pm strippers are depressing
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize