In America we eat man semen.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
