I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
