i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
