is your mom at the bar?
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
