I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
And then he peed in my hair
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