Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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