She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
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