She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
