first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize