you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Randomize