Buhtt sex?
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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